Day 16:The Groove

I think that I am starting to get the hang of this. I am finding some little miracles along the way. The biggest being that when I don't eat sugar, I don't crave sugar. I am satisfied with healthy choices.

You will notice that, for the time being at least, I do not weigh in. This is because I have a touch of Scale Madness and have found that when losing weight it is too discouraging to see the fluctuations. Like I said before, I know that I have 100 lbs to lose. I am a size 20-22 pants and an 18-20 shirt. I will keep you posted as things loosen up and when I periodically weigh in.

So. How did I get so damned fat? Easy. Two babies in less than two years, endless pans of brownies and gallons of Coke. I gained 25 lbs a kid and was already 50 lbs overweight. I could still shop at regular stores before the babies...barely. I have been using nursing as an excuse for the past year, but seriously, no one needs to eat fries and burritos all day to breastfeed.

I have to get this weight down so that I can be the mother I want to be. I had a fat mom. I don't want to be one. I remember the shame and guilt I carried with me as a child and I don't want my girls to experience the same thing. The way the story goes, it was parent teacher night when I was in the 2nd grade. The teacher told me that our parents would be coming! To our classroom! To sit in our desks! Holy shit. Not so much. So with my mind racing, I went to my teacher and asked if she would put a chair next to my desk because my mom? Well, she was very.......tall. I never want my girls to have to know that kind of panic. I want to be the mom full of energy who goes outside and plays! Not the fat woman tucked in the house.

The plan I am following is simple. Whole foods. Nothing processed except small amounts of whole grains. Vegetables. Fruits. Nuts. Lean Meats. Fish. So far I feel great and it hasn't been hard because my husband rocks. I also exercise 5 days a week. Two 45 minute walks and three twenty five minute sessions running on my rebounder (mini trampoline)

This has to work. It just has to.